Dreams of writing

I remember hearing a quote from a writer "I hate writing. I love having written." That is so true. I listen to podcasts talking about authors. Some of the books suck. Most of the books reviewed, of course, don't suck because the sucky ones don't make it to being interviewed. That is in the eye of the beholder.

If I could throw a switch and suddenly have already written a mediocre book, I would throw it. I'm not sure I would throw that switch if it meant I could never attempt to write something better. I would not sell my sole or anything. Still, I think about it.

I'm not even sure what my ultimate goal is. Do I want the public recognition of being an author? Do I want to leave a mark? Do I want to reach people on some level of consciousness? Do I want the residuals? Do I want adoration of fans or peers?

Yes. Well, no. ... maybe. I like the idea of having written. I like the idea of the freedom of living where I want at a comfortable standard and writing about what is in my head and heart. Who doesn't want something along that line?

Since I know so little about any given subject, I'm thinking fiction. I like the Star Wars universe, but I would hate to be tied down to any established universe. Every fan has a preconceived notion of what is and is not available. I would never get the rules straight. I would make some fundamental cock-up and receive a never ending stream of belligerent geeks telling me how I've made a catastrophic mistake because I had a door open the wrong way compared to something that was in a movie.

The Star Wars tax might be a bit steep. In order to use the same universe, I assume you have to hand a percentage over to Lucas. I don't really have a problem with that in theory. Practice would piss me off however. I've read some pretty lame books based on Star Wars characters and themes. It can't be that hard to get the nod from any powers that be.

The Wheel of Time series and Ring World series are kick ass fiction that made up their own universes. That's great. It takes a lot of work for sure. It is nothing that someone can't do with a few thousand hours of free time. I'm sure there are hundreds of good fiction books that do create their own worlds without a tremendous layout of effort. I can't think of any off hand.

The secret seems to be inspiration. One must be driven to put the information down and follow through with the work. It takes a long time to write something worth while. Few things roll off the end of a pen worth a dime without spending sweat and toil in the process. There are bound to be exceptions. People who sit down and the words poor from them are most likely writing about something they have experience with first hand, or they have had the subject on their mind for while.

I think I know how this will fall in to place for me. I will have to sit down and start writing anecdotes with my characters in a very short story form. Once I learn who these characters are and their motivations, I need to put together an outline and lengthen the stories possibly to chapters. Then I need to scrap the whole thing and concentrate on a degree in something useful.

That last little tern is what kills me every time. That is why I'll never write anything. In order to do it, I will have to go out on a limb a bit. I just don't know if I can keep that up for any length of time. Straight-Lace-Kelly derails the effort before it gets off the ground.

The blog is going well because it has no structure. Notice that there is no theme here. This blog is just whatever I feel like throwing against the wall at any given time.I like it like that. This is why I've stuck with it for so long.