Joke

A pirate walks in to a bar. He is a mess. The bartender asks "What happened to your leg?"

"Arrrr, a shark jumped up and bit off my leg."

The bartender winced and asked "What happened to your hand?"

"Well, I lost that in a sword fight."

The bartender thought he might as well get it all out of the way at once and asked "What happened to your eye?"

The pirate rolled his good eye and said "A scurvy bird flew over and pooped in my eye."

The bartender was taken back a bit. "Couldn't you wash it off or something? How did that cause you to loose your eye?"

"It was the day after I got me hook."