My Broke-Ass Woes

• The Halloween party is coming up. Nat is all excited. I'm excited too. I don't know how we are going to afford the food and drinks. I don't get paid until the first. I'm not putting anything on the credit card <period>.
  
• We can't afford to camp this weekend. I don't have $10 for the camp fee. Nat will still be out there. She doesn't have to pay to camp in participant's camping. I don't get paid again until the beginning of the month so that is pretty much it until November.
  
• The car needs breaks and tires. We have to do that next month.
• The school taxes came in at $1600. I have no idea if our mortgage company pays them or not. If not, we are really screwed for Christmas. It's Alief school district. That makes the pill just the more bitter.
  
• Sam's Club came due too. That is another $65 or so. It saves us well more than that in the long run, but damn.
  
• Elle needs a hearing check at school and I just plane don't have the $35. We can do it at the doctor's office next month, but it will cost $40 co-pay and whatever the test costs on top of that. FUCK!!
  
• The back door still needs fixing. Even if my father or brother's in law do the work, it is still $105 plus tax.
  
• The credit card is still at a zero balance. An it is going to stay that way. This is not a matter of pride. This is a matter of life and death.
  

I get depressed when I'm broke. On top of being broke, I cannot go to Fair any more. Nat complains right off the bat that I'm hard to be around when I get like this. That helps let me tell you.

Am I supposed to be happy go lucky with my pockets turned inside out, stiff upper lip and all that? I need to stop dumping my depression on the family. That is something that is wrong. It is hard to distract one's self without even a quarter in one's pocket.