Home Grown Terrorist Names
The Texas Chainsaw Hadine
Wicked Red-Neck of the West
Billy-Bob's Nuke Depot
Texas Liberation Front (taken)
The Beer-Belly Bomber
League of Over-fed American Freedom-fighters (LOAF)

Better demands, better plans
* Spell things correctly.

I cannot over emphasize the importance of correct spelling when presenting demands. Nothing makes people decide you are an amateur like misspelling.

* Use correct English (or applicable language)

This is again to make you look like a professional. Misuse of conjunctions will make the negotiation team counteroffer an ice-cream cone instead of the thirty million you demand.

* Sound intelligent

This is different than the above two. Sounding intelligent is more complex than using big words. You simply have to do your homework. Don't ask for a car and a helicopter for your escape unless you use one as a decoy. Make sure the people you demand from can provide what you demand well in advance of execution.

* Leave room for negotiation

Steve Martin said he would ask for three things. Million Dollars, Get away car, and the letter "M" stricken from the English Language. That way you have the insanity defense. Well, have wiggle room for time constraints and to make the negotiation team feel like they are getting somewhere.

* Know when to hold'em

Ultimatums, deadlines,  following through on every threat, traumatizing the opposition and other tools of negotiation are all necessary to a successful outcome. Remember, your victims need to feel like there is no way out, but you have every way out.

* Know when to fold'em

Have a plan to bail, pull the plug, cut and run whatever you want to call it. Don't let the enemy know when this might happen. Many kidnappers have escaped while the victims were trying to fulfill one of the false demands.

I hope these notes help. Happy carnage.

Dark Water
Nat and I went and saw Dark Water this evening at Alamo. Nat really enjoyed it. I have to say, it didn't impress me that much. Nat identified greatly with the mother. The screens between mother and daughter were touching. All in all, it was a tear jerker. It was more of a ghost story more than a horror movie.